Hey, Sweet Friend!

Can I tell you something that's been on my mind?

We're two weeks away from Thanksgiving, and everywhere I look, people are talking about the turkey.

How big it should be. When to thaw it. Whether to brine it. How to get the skin perfectly crispy.

And don't even get me started on the great dressing-versus-stuffing debate.

But you know what I haven't heard enough people talking about?

The people sitting around the table.

Not the place settings.
Not the centerpiece.
Not whether the napkins match the dishes.

The actual human beings who are going to pull up a chair.

Because somewhere along the way, I think we've started treating entertaining like a performance instead of what it really is.

An opportunity to connect.

THE LOST ART OF GATHERING

Earlier this year, I stood on the TEDx Asheville stage and shared something I believe with my whole heart:

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Dinner parties can change the world. (Haven't seen the TED talk yet?! Watch it here! 👆)

And I meant it.

Not because of the food.

Not because of a beautifully set table.

And certainly not because somebody managed to make a homemade pie crust without crying.

I believe dinner parties can change the world because they give us something we're desperately missing.

Each other.

We live in a world where we can communicate with practically anybody at any time.

We can send a text in seconds. We can watch someone's entire vacation unfold on Instagram. We can know what an acquaintance ate for lunch without having spoken to them in ten years.

And yet, knowing ABOUT someone is not the same thing as knowing them.

Something happens when we sit across from another person.

When we put down our phones.

When we ask a question and actually listen to the answer.

When we laugh so hard that somebody has to remind us what we were talking about in the first place.

That's where connection happens.

And I think we've forgotten just how much we need it.

THANKSGIVING IS THE ULTIMATE DINNER PARTY

Think about it.

Once a year, we collectively decide to stop what we're doing, cook an enormous meal, and gather around tables.

Some tables are filled with generations of family.

Some are filled with friends who've become family.

Some have two people.

Some have twenty.

Some have an empty chair that reminds us of someone we wish could be there.

And some are waiting for someone to extend an invitation.

That's the part I keep coming back to.

What if we thought about Thanksgiving as more than a meal we're responsible for making?

What if we thought about it as an opportunity to make someone feel like they belong?

Because you never really know what someone is carrying when they walk through your door.

They might be celebrating something wonderful.

They might be navigating the hardest year of their life.

They might be lonely.

They might just need one evening where someone looks them in the eye and says, "I'm so glad you're here."

And what a gift it is to be the person who says it.

BE THE INVITE.

One of the things I talk about all the time is being the invite.

Not waiting for somebody else to organize the gathering.

Not waiting until your house is bigger or your dishes match.

Not waiting until life feels less busy.

Just deciding that connection matters enough to make the first move.

And here's what I want you to consider this week:

Is there someone who needs an invitation?

Maybe it's a neighbor who lives alone.

Maybe it's a coworker who doesn't have family nearby.

Maybe it's a friend who's going through a difficult season.

Or maybe it's someone you've been meaning to get together with for months, but the calendar never seems to cooperate.

Now, I'm not suggesting you add twelve more people to your Thanksgiving guest list and spiral.

Good heavens, no.

I'm suggesting you look around and pay attention.

Because sometimes the most meaningful part of hospitality happens before anybody ever sits down.

It happens when someone realizes they were thought of.

They were remembered.

They were wanted.

And if Thanksgiving Day isn't the right fit, there's always room for a pot of soup and a loaf of bread another evening.

Hospitality doesn't have to happen on a holiday to matter.

A LITTLE PEEK INTO MY KITCHEN

Now, lest you think I've abandoned our Thanksgiving Playbook to get philosophical on a Wednesday...

We're still getting ready over here!

This week, my big projects are making my Thanksgiving mashed potatoes ahead of time and roasting and mashing sweet potatoes for the casserole.

Those sweet potatoes are getting tucked into freezer bags, flattened out, and stacked away until it's time to put everything together.

And every little thing I finish now is one less thing standing between me and enjoying Thanksgiving.

That's why I'm doing all this preparation.

Not so I can win Thanksgiving.

Not so I can prove how much I can accomplish.

But so I can actually be present when the people I love are gathered around the table.

Because what's the point of preparing a beautiful meal if we're too exhausted to enjoy the people eating it?

YOUR WEDNESDAY TABLE TALK

Here's what I want you to think about today:

Who has made you feel like you belonged?

Think about a time someone invited you in.

Maybe they pulled up an extra chair.

Maybe they remembered your favorite food.

Maybe they welcomed you into a room where you didn't know a soul.

What did that feel like?

And more importantly...

How could you give that feeling to someone else?

It doesn't have to be grand.

It doesn't have to be expensive.

Sometimes all it takes is a simple, "Come on over. We'd love to have you."

SWEETPEA SAYS:

Before we were profiles, we were people at tables.

And I think it's time we remembered that.

We don't need more perfectly curated gatherings.

We need more conversations that go a little deeper.

More invitations that don't require a special occasion.

More tables where people feel comfortable being exactly who they are.

More moments when we look up from our phones and realize the person sitting across from us is worth our full attention.

Because one dinner party won't change the world.

But how will it change yours?

I'll see you Sunday with our next Thanksgiving game plan. We're getting closer, and there's still plenty we can do to make this holiday a little easier.

Until then, be the invite.

With love and a seat at my table,

Ashley

P.S. I'd love to hear your answer to today's question. Who made you feel like you belonged? Hit reply and tell me about them. I have a feeling those are the stories we need to be sharing more often. 💚